BREAKING: Trump Grants Request For a ‘Build The Wall’ Benefit Concert in DC After NYC Says No

After the liberals in New York City denied Ted Nugent the right to a concert in Central Park to raise money for the Wall, the Nuge got a call from an old friend — President Trump. According to a Nugent Aide working on the Congressional Canned Hunt Committee, President Trump has authorized the wall benefit concert on the National Mall for the last weekend in March; the same weekend the cherry blossoms arrive.

According to White House Director of Wall Benefits, Art Tubolls:

“Ted is free to hold his concert and make as much money as he wants. He’ll be allowed to connect to the National Power Grid, which runs on the Tesla Motor on top of the Capitol Building. We’re hoping Ted raises at least $2 billion so we can get to the business of kicking people off their land and destroying the water table in Texas.”

Nugent’s concert will feature Loretta Lynn, Toby Keith, Kid Rock, and The Freedom Girls. It is also rumored that Dolly Parton will sing a song to the dead Burt Reynolds and that Chris Kyle’s Widow, Tamara, will sing “God Bless the USA.” The stage will be set with the World War II Memorial as a backdrop so Nugent’s father, a war hero, can be memorialized during the show. Who better to honor our veterans than Ted Nugent.

About Flagg Eagleton 103 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.