BREAKING: NYC Liberals Refuse Ted Nugent’s ‘Build The Wall Benefit Concert’ Permit

The NewYork City Office of Zoning and Permits has denied Ted Nugent’s request for a permit to hold a benefit concert, for the good of America, in Central Park. The concert, which is the brain-child of crippled Senior Mailman Bri Kolfag, Was to headline such greats as Hank Williams Jr, The Freedom Girls, and Loretta Lynn — or a recording of her if she doesn’t make it that long. According to event coordinator, Raymond Cist, being turned down for the permit is a crushing blow:

“We really wanted this to be in New York City. Garth Brooks played Central Park and a million people showed up. The City is being over-sensitive to their minority population and calling the cause things like ‘nationalist propaganda’ and ‘racism.’ They just don’t understand. We’re not racists. We’re just trying to keep America safe from outsiders and Muslamic Radicalists.”

We reached out to the New York City Mayor’s office. Deputy Mayor Art Tubolls told us the office and administration support the decision:

“We didn’t approach this from a standpoint of politics. We approached it from a standpoint of safety. If you think having a million people in pickup trucks wearing confederate flags and shouting things like “build the wall” and “lock her up” in one of the most progressive and diverse cities on the planet is a good idea, you probably need a reality check.

This will bring Nazis, nationalists and a whole bunch of violence. No thanks.”

New Yorkers are just afraid of everything. This concert would bring peace-loving conservatives from around the country looking to help secure our borders, by force if necessary. If the people of New York aren’t alright with having their rural neighbors come to town, maybe they should build walls around their big, dumb cities.

Uncle Ted says he isn’t done looking and will throw the concert on his own ranch in Montana if he has to.

About Flagg Eagleton 105 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.