BREAKING: 3 Dems Lose Seats To ‘Widespread Voter Fraud’

The Pennsylvania Secretary of State is set to announce that three of the five seats for the House of Representatives that went to Democrats were won in invalid elections. Chairman for the Pennsylvania Committee of Legislative Election Interference Oversite, Art Tubolls, told Fox and Friends he expects the backlash to be severe. The interview, set to be aired on Fox and Friends tomorrow, tells the story from the side of truth and justice:

“There are no fewer than 300 examples of people in Pennsylvania voting twice. That’s just who we know about so far. Of those, 290 were illegals and the other 10 were unregistered felons. The system obviously broke down and we need to fix it.”

Tom Kortankian, Pennsylvania’s Chief Justice, says his office was instructed by the White House to begin changing laws as they see fit to combat the rampant fraud we’re seeing:

“We’ve been told to suppress the votes of those who can’t prove who they are or where they live or move from state to state a lot or always forget to change their address. Of the 140 million registered voters in America, only about 110 million deserve an actual vote.”

That’s true. Imagine if people who lived their lives on public assistance actually had a voice? We’d have nothing but free stuff like college tuition and healthcare, $15 an hour burger-flippers and a clean, sustainable environment. Nobody has time or money for that.

About Flagg Eagleton 104 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.