The ink was not yet dry on Vice President Mike Pence’s announcement that he was not going to be President Trump’s running mate in 2020, when the race to replace him sprang into full gear. While it is far too early to speculate, a number of potential replacements have already been bandied about.
Trump campaign manager for vice presidential affairs, Art Tubolls, issued the following statement:
“We are shell shocked at Mike Pence’s sudden announcement. At the same time, we weren’t too surprised because we all saw the signs that something wasn’t right. Mike was spending way too much time with Nancy Pelosi and would always leave meetings with her smelling of alcohol and stumbling around. Just the other day, he fell down the Capitol stairs and cracked his cranium. While we are sad to see him go and are grateful for his service to the country, he needs help.”
Meanwhile, Justin Stoneberg, who was only this morning appointed to head the vice presidential search committee that will replace Pence, hinted at who he had in mind to replace Pence:
“Luckily we all saw this coming and have already drawn up a list of potential replacements. Those include – in no particular order – Uncle Si from Duck Dynasty, Kid Rock, Michelle Bachmann, and Ted Nugent. Actually, scratch Uncle Si, he just died. President Trump is at this very moment interviewing all potential candidates (except for Uncle Si, since he’s dead) and is hoping to make an official announcement soon.”
Given everything that is going on in this country, this development could not have come at a worse time. We can only hope that President Trump will find a suitable replacement in a timely manner to minimize the disruption to his campaign for re-election.