Pelosi Says Trump Supporters Attending Church During Crisis Should Be “Spayed and Neutered”

A reporter from OAN was able to capture open mic footage of a visibly drunk and defiant Nancy Pelosi commenting on President Trump’s latest missive to reopen churches across America and allow his supporters to observe their faith. OAN’s chief White House correspondent Joe Barron provided us with the footage of the incident as a professional courtesy.

A partial transcript of the audio caught on the open mic and edited for family consumption is provided below. Note that some portions of the audio were inaudible due to Mrs. Pelosi slurring her words:

“{inaudible} that moron is trying to kill the entire country. Who the {expletive deleted} does the damn fool he think he is? And his supporters are stupid enough {pauses and takes swig from bottle} to believe the idiot in chief when he says it’s safe to go to church. They should all be sprayed {sic} and nutted {loud belch}, I mean neutered because they’re just {inaudible} and shouldn’t breed. I already carry Trump’s balls in my purse, so what’s a few hundred thousand more? Well {expletive deleted} it all. Now I need to relieve myself. {drains bottle and stumbles off}”

Asked whether this type of behavior was worthy of an American politician, let alone the House Speaker of the United States, Pelosi spokesperson Art Tubolls defended the speaker and deflected to President Trump:

“You’re kidding, right? The speaker is under enormous stress right now. We all are, thanks to the moron in the White House who couldn’t lead his way out of a paper bag. And we’re all suffering from it. There isn’t a single sober person on our staff right now. When this is over, we’re all going to rehab.”

Is this what we want to hear from the House Speaker and her staff? We report, you decide.

About Watt A Plonker 30 Articles
Watt A. Plonker is a Wurlitzer Prize winning journalist and author of several books on Potato Farming. His latest book, "The Tantalizing Truth About Taters" was on the New York Times best seller list and was awarded the prestigious Creme de la Menthe prize for Culinary Science Fiction. Mr. Plonker lives in Peckham, South East London, where he shares a flat with his wife Gladys, who is a nurse with the National Health Service, and his pet hamster Rodney.

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